"There’s a saying that goes “People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.” Okay. How about “Nobody should throw stones.” That’s crappy behavior. My policy is: “No stone throwing regardless of housing situation.” Don’t do it. There is one exception though. If you’re trapped in a glass house, and you have a stone, then throw it. What are you, an idiot? So maybe it’s “Only people in glass houses should throw stones, provided they are trapped in the house with a stone.” It’s a little longer, but yeah."

"I would start a revolution, but I just bought a hammock"

"Δεν ελπίζω τίποτα. Δε φοβάμαι τίποτα. Είμαι λέφτερος."

"Shaking it around and putting it on my head? That makes me sound like an idiot!"

"I will strangle you in your face!"

"I still don’t know how I feel about listening to Chris Brown. I want to be a forgiving person, but every time I hear his voice I picture him on Larry King, wearing that stupid bow tie and avoiding the truth. Even though I like “Deuces” I kind of wonder what the point is. A break up song about moving on to something better? Motherfucker you beat Rihanna’s face. Maybe take a while before talking about that kind of stuff."